25. Dark Nights

“Before the divine fire is introduced into the substance of the soul and united with it through perfect and complete purgation and purity, its flame, which is the Holy Spirit, wounds the soul by destroying and consuming the imperfections of its bad habits. And this is the work of the Holy Spirit, in which he disposes it for divine union and transformation in God through love. The very fire of love that afterward is united with the soul, glorifying it, is what previously assailed it by purging it, just as the fire that penetrates a log of wood is the same that first makes an assault on the wood, wounding it with the flame, drying it out, and stripping it of its unsightly qualities until it is so disposed that it can be penetrated and transformed into the fire. Spiritual writers call this activity the purgative way.” ~ St. John of the Cross

At the end of each day the sun sets. Is it gone?

In the same way on our spiritual journey, as we evolve and grow as souls and wend our way home in the eternal heart, night comes. Day comes again after the night. There is no day without night and there is no night without day.

For us to know what we are in toto, to truly plumb our depths and find Truth, all that we thought that we were must be destroyed. We must offer our very self on a silver platter to our highest Self, the eternal Truth.

Our offering is always accepted. Grace exists always, but we become naturally concerned and impatient. God always accepts our offering to Her on Her terms and in Her time. Regardless of how long it may take our offering is always lovingly accepted. When our offering is accepted God gives us Her very Self in return and in exchange we become not separate from Her.

For this union to be complete our house must be shaken to its very foundation. A great earthquake must come and we must endure it. A fire must burn down all that we know, all that we think we are, and we must light the match and start the fire. In fact we must use a flamethrower as much of what we carry is so deeply rooted only a massive fire will do.

Lest we miss this point, here we’ll also note that the earthquake is God, the match is God, the flamethrower is God and our very desire to find our highest Self is God. Our desire to seek shelter is God; for this world exists that me may take shelter in God. All is God’s grace alone, and yet we often feel completely alone as we go. No friends or family take this journey with us, though all support us in various ways seen or unseen, known or unknown. This journey to find Truth is one we must take alone, and at times we feel so alone that we weep, we scream, we feel great pain and emptiness such as we have never experienced. We do not know what to do.

Literally everything must crash down, for our attachment to the false images of this world must finally be broken in order to find what we have come here searching for. We are, though, honestly never alone. It just seems that way.

So as we go at times we will experience this dark night. As we go deeper the nights will get darker, and at the same time we may say that the days will become brighter and more full. The nights are what will shake us, the days will give us strength and this strength must be spent to endure the night.

Endure it. There is nothing in this world that lasts, there is nothing that can provide you with what you want. Serve, love, give completely of yourself. Go deeply and then go deeper still. You can be assured that your dark nights will be so dark that you will feel you must die, you must give up. When this happens take it all for union and offer it all to God. Take it, bear it, accept it gratefully. Embrace the dark night, for the dark night represents your pending liberation and the brightest light which cannot even be imagined. All shadows and all darkness will finally be eradicated in this bright light of Truth.

Empty your cup, empty it completely, brave it, be patient, and your cup will be filled to overflowing.

In this way will the dark nights come and then pass away forever.